"Shameless Whore of A Copywriter Will Write For Small-Biz Owners to Bring In Floods Of New Customers for dirt cheap!"
From the crowded
desk of Chris Chia:
Dear Business Owner, I've got a favor to ask of you.
If you want to sleep peacefully at night as a business owner knowing where his next paycheck is coming from, knowing that the bills are going to be paid and there's money left over to enjoy, this may be one of the most important letters you'll ever read.
Here's Why This Letter May Change Your Life as a Small-Business Owner:
I've discovered the coveted secrets of entrepreneurs, hustlers and marketers who've used them to supersize their incomes while still doing business in an easy, lucrative and fun way!
On my desk, there are stacks of books, advertisements and newsletters I've studied and analyzed till my hands were drenched in ink. If you looked through all of them, there's no doubt you'd leave with at least a couple of ideas and tactics that could very easily double, or even triple your business profits.
I've studied direct-response marketing and copywriting to the point that my eyes are drooping and crossed... my writing hand shaking from 4 hour study sessions... to the point I HAD TO GO SEE THE DOCTOR FOR ELBOW TENDONITIS! (Wowza)
The stuff I've been studying isn't just some random books I found on the Internet. I've delved deep into the archives of advertising to study the greats such as Claude Hopkins and Robert Collier... as well as the modern geniuses of people like Gary Halbert, John Carlton, Joe Sugarman, Dan Kennedy, Frank Kern, Eben Pagan, Joe Polish and Matt Furey.
There's a reason to my madness. I desperately want to make it as a copywriter and marketing consultant, and I'm willing to pay whatever price it takes to get there.
Chances are, if you're a business owner, you've probably been a VICTIM of advertising-- constantly wasting money, not knowing what does or doesn't work, trying new things too often, and honestly-- I'm here to inform you that THAT'S NOT GOING TO WORK.
Big, bumbling companies and their wasteful, confusing advertising are catching up with them-- that's the secret parasite that's eroded away so many big-name companies. Leaving them shriveled up, fragile and defenceless to the whims and fancies of the economy. Killed by the last recession in cold blood.
If you're a small business warrior, local retailer or even a mid-sized company owner, you could be massacred way quicker if you're not having marketing and advertising that's SYSTEMATICALLY and effectively getting high-paying, ready-to-buy customers walking through the door.
What are these secrets?
I'm talking about the secrets of direct-response marketing. From how to get your prospect dripping with cold sweat until he buys your product and lets out a sigh of relief and joy to taking your customers and having them virtually begging for more and paying you double, maybe triple of your usual transaction price, these are the secrets that people have used from the days of the Romans and chariots to the multi-millionaire Internet Marketers of today.
With these secrets, you'll be able to slay the evil demons of business such as:
Look. If you've experienced at least one of those things, chances are, you didn't like it. With the secrets of direct-response marketing, you'll systematically slaughter each and every one of those demonic devils.
Here's the deal:
I want to use these secrets in your business, free of charge! But first:
The Not-So-Fine Fine Print that's
UP IN YOUR FACE:
These secrets and strategies may have worked for those who discovered and used them, but I'm not saying in any way that you're going to be making money at all from this. The average business owner who gets someone to do advertising for his business rarely makes money from it.
So, I am in no way implying that any kind of results or profits you get from working with me are remotely typical.
Ultimately, the only person who can make your business a profit-generating machine that sends you off to vacations in beach paradises.... is YOU!!
I can bring in a raging hurricane of customers raring to buy from you... but if you don't deliver the goods, I can't help you there.
GOT THAT STRAIGHT???
Let's get on it.
What is this offer anyways? Can you please explain what the hell you wanna do with my business?
I will write letters, advertisements, brochures, basically anything that needs words.
But most importantly, I will write them with one purpose in mind:
To bring in a hurricane of buying customers into your business!
That's my part of the job.
I will write:
I want to go into your business and help you with your advertising to rake in a torrential rain of customers so you can have more business, more money, more profits, and most importantly, to be able to sleep peacefully at night.
desk of Chris Chia:
Dear Business Owner, I've got a favor to ask of you.
If you want to sleep peacefully at night as a business owner knowing where his next paycheck is coming from, knowing that the bills are going to be paid and there's money left over to enjoy, this may be one of the most important letters you'll ever read.
Here's Why This Letter May Change Your Life as a Small-Business Owner:
I've discovered the coveted secrets of entrepreneurs, hustlers and marketers who've used them to supersize their incomes while still doing business in an easy, lucrative and fun way!
On my desk, there are stacks of books, advertisements and newsletters I've studied and analyzed till my hands were drenched in ink. If you looked through all of them, there's no doubt you'd leave with at least a couple of ideas and tactics that could very easily double, or even triple your business profits.
I've studied direct-response marketing and copywriting to the point that my eyes are drooping and crossed... my writing hand shaking from 4 hour study sessions... to the point I HAD TO GO SEE THE DOCTOR FOR ELBOW TENDONITIS! (Wowza)
The stuff I've been studying isn't just some random books I found on the Internet. I've delved deep into the archives of advertising to study the greats such as Claude Hopkins and Robert Collier... as well as the modern geniuses of people like Gary Halbert, John Carlton, Joe Sugarman, Dan Kennedy, Frank Kern, Eben Pagan, Joe Polish and Matt Furey.
There's a reason to my madness. I desperately want to make it as a copywriter and marketing consultant, and I'm willing to pay whatever price it takes to get there.
Chances are, if you're a business owner, you've probably been a VICTIM of advertising-- constantly wasting money, not knowing what does or doesn't work, trying new things too often, and honestly-- I'm here to inform you that THAT'S NOT GOING TO WORK.
Big, bumbling companies and their wasteful, confusing advertising are catching up with them-- that's the secret parasite that's eroded away so many big-name companies. Leaving them shriveled up, fragile and defenceless to the whims and fancies of the economy. Killed by the last recession in cold blood.
If you're a small business warrior, local retailer or even a mid-sized company owner, you could be massacred way quicker if you're not having marketing and advertising that's SYSTEMATICALLY and effectively getting high-paying, ready-to-buy customers walking through the door.
What are these secrets?
I'm talking about the secrets of direct-response marketing. From how to get your prospect dripping with cold sweat until he buys your product and lets out a sigh of relief and joy to taking your customers and having them virtually begging for more and paying you double, maybe triple of your usual transaction price, these are the secrets that people have used from the days of the Romans and chariots to the multi-millionaire Internet Marketers of today.
With these secrets, you'll be able to slay the evil demons of business such as:
- Cold calling prospects and getting rudely hung up on you
- Having to convince skeptical prospects that look and look and look... but don't buy a single thing!
- Scrimping, miserly customers that fight for every last cent!
- Having no absolutely free time
- The stressed, worried looks of your family's faces
- Staring at your ceiling at night from your bed... unable to sleep because you just don't know what's going to happen in the future
- Constant worry and anxiety that's putting deep, cavernous lines on your forehead!
Look. If you've experienced at least one of those things, chances are, you didn't like it. With the secrets of direct-response marketing, you'll systematically slaughter each and every one of those demonic devils.
Here's the deal:
I want to use these secrets in your business, free of charge! But first:
The Not-So-Fine Fine Print that's
UP IN YOUR FACE:
These secrets and strategies may have worked for those who discovered and used them, but I'm not saying in any way that you're going to be making money at all from this. The average business owner who gets someone to do advertising for his business rarely makes money from it.
So, I am in no way implying that any kind of results or profits you get from working with me are remotely typical.
Ultimately, the only person who can make your business a profit-generating machine that sends you off to vacations in beach paradises.... is YOU!!
I can bring in a raging hurricane of customers raring to buy from you... but if you don't deliver the goods, I can't help you there.
GOT THAT STRAIGHT???
Let's get on it.
What is this offer anyways? Can you please explain what the hell you wanna do with my business?
I will write letters, advertisements, brochures, basically anything that needs words.
But most importantly, I will write them with one purpose in mind:
To bring in a hurricane of buying customers into your business!
That's my part of the job.
I will write:
- Sales Letters-- so your customers are dripping with lustful desire for whatever it is you're selling!
- Multi-step Projects (Sales letter, Upsell letters, Stick letters) --first, they buy your product with little resistance... then, TRIPLING their order with upsell letters... becoming lifelong customers that enthusiastically crawl through a field of broken glass on their knees to continue to do business with you!
- Website copy-- A customer that comes to your website usually is interested in your business. If your copy isn't taking advantage of that and capturing their information and converting them into ardent fans... you could practically be flushing wads money down the toilet without kickass website copy!
- Email copy-- The ultimate relationship builder with your clients. Imagine your customer not sending your mail to the junk folder... but actually anticipating you to contact them... and grinning as they open up their wallets to shove money into your hand!
- Direct Company Mailings. The ultimate marketing weapon that has been forgotten in the Internet age. With direct mailing, you'll foster a personal relationship with your customers that you competitors could never overcome... place your business into "The Expert Category" in their heads... and get them to drop whatever they're doing and call you for business within minutes of reading your letter.
- Letters for employment: attach these things to the resume you're sending into the company, and your future employer will be instantly connecting and loving your application... ignoring the more "qualified" interviewees, tossing their resumes aside and sitting down to read through your application and hire you with a delirious ecstacy.
- Recruitment ads. Looking for new employees that don't waffle away their working hours and actually get stuff done? I'll write those ads for you. Imagine finally interviewing someone who's motivated and absolutely right for the job you're looking to fill... without awkward interviewees... without having to dig deep to uncover nasty pasts and get employees that you can actually trust.
I want to go into your business and help you with your advertising to rake in a torrential rain of customers so you can have more business, more money, more profits, and most importantly, to be able to sleep peacefully at night.
Does this all sound too good to be true? Yep, it probably is. Let me tell you about all the flaws and weaknesses I have that most marketing and advertising professionals won't tell you until they've spent your money and brought in no customers!
I'm a one man job.
I studied and worked on all this stuff from a simple computer, from my bedroom.
I printed out forgotten textbooks on marketing and advertising from a local printer in a mall.
Talk about the "garage phase" of business. I'm right there.
I don't have any proven winners yet.
I haven't earned much in terms of copywriting credentials.
I often procrastinate a lot until I have a big deadline to produce something magical. (don't we all sometimes?)
I've only studied and written a few ads. Nothing to show I'm a copywriting genius yet.
GEE! That's a lot of flaws!
I could probably think of another dozen or so, but you get the deal. I'm not perfect.
But what I am, is DRIVEN, MOTIVATED, and occasionally AN ARROGANT FOOL!
(to say all these things, you've got to be a little bit of one)
So I'll:
I studied and worked on all this stuff from a simple computer, from my bedroom.
I printed out forgotten textbooks on marketing and advertising from a local printer in a mall.
Talk about the "garage phase" of business. I'm right there.
I don't have any proven winners yet.
I haven't earned much in terms of copywriting credentials.
I often procrastinate a lot until I have a big deadline to produce something magical. (don't we all sometimes?)
I've only studied and written a few ads. Nothing to show I'm a copywriting genius yet.
GEE! That's a lot of flaws!
I could probably think of another dozen or so, but you get the deal. I'm not perfect.
But what I am, is DRIVEN, MOTIVATED, and occasionally AN ARROGANT FOOL!
(to say all these things, you've got to be a little bit of one)
So I'll:
- Work really hard on every project I get, so you can get a project that's a winner.
- I will fight tooth and nail to refine every last word, rewrite every last sentence and create a money-sucking ad that makes you rich so you can sleep peacefully at night and send your kids to the finest schools... or if you're not married with kids... so you can sleep peacefully at night and take your sweetheart out to gorgeous restaurants.
- I will put every ounce of working energies I have to make your project work, so you can know that you've finally got a marketer you can trust to bring in the money.
I can talk a big talk... but here's what other people say about me!
"With your marketing advice, I've gone ahead to create a team called TheGarageProjectthat's going to become an app development company, and I couldn't have done it without the marketing insight and business inspiration you gave me!"
-Francesco Barfoed, Copenhagen, Denmark
"Damn, I'm being honest when I say this, you actually write really well. If I ever wanna sell something, I'm going to you for sure."
-Christian Tachev, Perth, Western Australia
"Chris is constantly dropping little nuggets of marketing and business genius in person and his writing. If there's one guy I'd trust when it comes to making your business work and bringing in customers, I'd go with him every single time."
-Jonathan Nyan, Singapore
-Francesco Barfoed, Copenhagen, Denmark
"Damn, I'm being honest when I say this, you actually write really well. If I ever wanna sell something, I'm going to you for sure."
-Christian Tachev, Perth, Western Australia
"Chris is constantly dropping little nuggets of marketing and business genius in person and his writing. If there's one guy I'd trust when it comes to making your business work and bringing in customers, I'd go with him every single time."
-Jonathan Nyan, Singapore
So here's I'm hoping we can do!
I'm looking for clients that I can write for. Clients that are fed up of the demons of business and want to sleep peacefully at night. So, if you're interested, fill up the form below and I'll get into contact with you within 1-2 business days.
Look, this must be a big decision for you. Maybe you've got to ask your wife, or ask your business partner.
So, I want to make this as little of a risk for you.
After you've filled in the form, we'll either fix an hour-long meet up within the week or an hour-long phone call. In the call, we'll discuss a few things:
And if you're not satisfied by this phone call, I'll give you $100 in cash on the spot or transfer it straight into your bank account.
Just so we're clear, I'm saying it again:
So we'll meet up and go through my 11 Quick Fix Checklist that could instantly reveal the "hidden" profits of your business. We'll also see if we can double or triple your profits... and if you're not satisfied at all... I'll give you $100 in cash on the spot, or transfer $100 straight into your bank account if we're on the phone.
You don't have much to lose. Think about it. What's the worse that could happen? I could turn out to be a complete pied-piper-snake-oil-salesman, but you're still going to get $100.
Or it could turn out to be a start of a business relationship that could lead to bigger profits, more free time with your loved ones, the freedom you desire and the security of knowing that you're going to have customers that are enthusiastically buying from you.
Dedicated to multiplying your profits,
Chris Chia
P.S. If you've just skipped all the way down to the P.S. like I know a lot of people do, here's what I'm offering up:
I'm a newbie rookie of a direct-response marketing copywriter. I'm willing to be paid dirt cheap to prove myself. Fill in the form below about your business and I'll contact you within 1-2 business days to meet up with you or call you for an hour. I'll show you how we can use the millionaire-making secrets of direct-response marketing to create a flood of high-paying, enthusiastic customers in your business through my copywriting. If you're not satisfied at all, I'll give you a $100 bucks on the spot. If not, we'll see how we can work together to supercharge your profits and make your business serve you, not the opposite.
I'm currently in the lookout for only a few clients a month, and once that's full, this offer's gonna go. So if you've even got the slightest desire to stop the pains of prospecting, cold calling and 70-80 hour workweeks, you'll want to fill in the form below now.
P.S. Imagine a life where you don't have to worry on where your next customer or client is going to come from. Imagine a life where you can make those high-paying, ideal customers or clients appear at will. That could happen if you take action now.
P.P.S. The next 5 years are going to fly by anyways. Are you going to spend the next 5 years fretting and frantically worrying about money 24 hours a day, 7 days a week? Or are you going to spend the next 5 years bringing in your ideal customers, using the secrets of direct-response marketing and copywriting that have skyrocketed beginner business owners to millionaires? You'll be on your way towards that if you fill in the form now.
P.P.P.S. Your business and money worries aren't just affecting you, they're also affecting the quality time with your friends and family. Me working with you isn't just about helping you to bring in a flood of quality, buying customers-- It's about helping you create a business success that overflows into the other areas of your life. But nothing happens unless you take action now.
Look, this must be a big decision for you. Maybe you've got to ask your wife, or ask your business partner.
So, I want to make this as little of a risk for you.
After you've filled in the form, we'll either fix an hour-long meet up within the week or an hour-long phone call. In the call, we'll discuss a few things:
- Where you're getting your current customers from and if it's possible to double and triple your profits with them!
- What you're selling, how you're selling it and how we can use some direct-response magic to boost your bottom line!
- My 11 Quick Fix Checklist that I use with every business I consult with... going through this list could point out several areas that you could be flushing your profits down the toilet!
- What you want me to help you with, and how we're going to make it happen.
- Your marketing process that you're currently using, and how we could possibly supercharge it into the profit stratosphere!
And if you're not satisfied by this phone call, I'll give you $100 in cash on the spot or transfer it straight into your bank account.
Just so we're clear, I'm saying it again:
So we'll meet up and go through my 11 Quick Fix Checklist that could instantly reveal the "hidden" profits of your business. We'll also see if we can double or triple your profits... and if you're not satisfied at all... I'll give you $100 in cash on the spot, or transfer $100 straight into your bank account if we're on the phone.
You don't have much to lose. Think about it. What's the worse that could happen? I could turn out to be a complete pied-piper-snake-oil-salesman, but you're still going to get $100.
Or it could turn out to be a start of a business relationship that could lead to bigger profits, more free time with your loved ones, the freedom you desire and the security of knowing that you're going to have customers that are enthusiastically buying from you.
Dedicated to multiplying your profits,
Chris Chia
P.S. If you've just skipped all the way down to the P.S. like I know a lot of people do, here's what I'm offering up:
I'm a newbie rookie of a direct-response marketing copywriter. I'm willing to be paid dirt cheap to prove myself. Fill in the form below about your business and I'll contact you within 1-2 business days to meet up with you or call you for an hour. I'll show you how we can use the millionaire-making secrets of direct-response marketing to create a flood of high-paying, enthusiastic customers in your business through my copywriting. If you're not satisfied at all, I'll give you a $100 bucks on the spot. If not, we'll see how we can work together to supercharge your profits and make your business serve you, not the opposite.
I'm currently in the lookout for only a few clients a month, and once that's full, this offer's gonna go. So if you've even got the slightest desire to stop the pains of prospecting, cold calling and 70-80 hour workweeks, you'll want to fill in the form below now.
P.S. Imagine a life where you don't have to worry on where your next customer or client is going to come from. Imagine a life where you can make those high-paying, ideal customers or clients appear at will. That could happen if you take action now.
P.P.S. The next 5 years are going to fly by anyways. Are you going to spend the next 5 years fretting and frantically worrying about money 24 hours a day, 7 days a week? Or are you going to spend the next 5 years bringing in your ideal customers, using the secrets of direct-response marketing and copywriting that have skyrocketed beginner business owners to millionaires? You'll be on your way towards that if you fill in the form now.
P.P.P.S. Your business and money worries aren't just affecting you, they're also affecting the quality time with your friends and family. Me working with you isn't just about helping you to bring in a flood of quality, buying customers-- It's about helping you create a business success that overflows into the other areas of your life. But nothing happens unless you take action now.